safety scissors

by lauren ashley

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this album is a tribute to my shitty childhood. I made these kid related songs and had fun with my buddy mr. uke.

enjoy my silly creation!


released May 27, 2016



all rights reserved


lauren ashley Lake Forest, California

more tunes comin' soon!

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Track Name: mr. caterpillar
I see a caterpillar climbing up my garden
it's yellow and furry and it's got on great big shoes
he got them from an outlet from outside of Nevada
it was buy 1 get 1 free so he bought a pair for you
he bought a pair of you

mr. caterpillar said that his trip was very long
so he took 1
took 2
took 3 pills
and listened to this song
he stretched his arms, let out a yawn then started to cry
he said" I've been waiting for this , the first time I can fly."

hey mr. caterpillar x3
wake up it's timr for dinner!
Track Name: lunch meat
animals are people, but if you don't agree
you can talk to my uncle
he's drunk and obese
he's been eating them since grade school and that's why he's sick
not sick in a good way, his heart's about to tick

cows say moo but they say no too
they say no to burgers and eating beef stew
and sheep go bah but they also say nah
they say nah to blankets, get warm someway else
chickens say cluck but they also say fuck you
fuck the system
chick- fil- a
and mcdonalds too
female mammals have nipples to nourish their kids
and so do humans, just watch your birth vid
Track Name: ants on a hill
ants are on the hill
they're marching one by one
ants are on the hill
they're carrying their guns

they're called the black army
they're coming for your soul
hide your food
because they're gonna eat it all